The big surprise out of the Riviera this week isn’t that the new Brad Pitt movie is going to have its premiere at the
Cannes Film Festival — Brad Pitt has become a staple at Cannes, replacing Jerry Lewis, if not croissants — but rather that Vanity Fair has cancelled its black-tie ball. It was one of the most sought-after invitations of the festival, according to the Daily Telegraph, which makes me feel stupid because after seven years of going to Cannes, not only have I never been invited to this ball, I never even heard of it until now, when it is too late to seek after an invitation. Maybe it’s just as well. It’s easy enough to be snubbed by the parties you do know about. The important part of this news is that it signals the world economic crunch is getting really serious: where once wealth was meant to trickle down, now poverty is beginning to trickle up. People in Cannes who own black-tie outfits are going to be wandering the streets, causing untoward crowds at the panini stands where the rest of us have been spending our gala evenings. I blame the bankers for this. As for Jimmy’z, I wandered in there one afternoon looking for the casino — in a cruel irony, I had visions of winning enough Euros to buy a tuxedo — but I was asked to leave because of my attire. A jean jacket, it turns out, is not a jacket, although if I had more time I’d get my lawyer involved in this, if I had a lawyer. And the news gets darker. Yacht rentals are apparently in decline because companies are booking them for just a few days rather than for the whole festival. I’ve never actually been on one of those either, but one year I met an attractive female journalist from Winnipeg who did get to go and told me all about it. It’s no big deal, it turns out: you stand around drinking champagne and eating rich foods while successful men flirt with you while trying to look down your top. It’s happened to me hundreds of times. The Cannes hotel business is also apparently suffering because fewer people are going to the festival and they are staying for shorter periods of time. I know this is true because this year for the first time, I am receiving letters from Cannes rental companies promising me a fine choice of accommodations.
The Telegraph also reports that in this era of recession and hardship, a local caterer says some of his clients are ordering wine instead of champagne and pissaladiere (Provencal onion tart) rather than foie gras for their parties. That’s practically the last straw, and it hardly seems worth going to the festival at all, except that I already have my place rented, and it’s my only chance this spring to check up on Brad Pitt.