The National logo, global utilities Primary navigation Being an ambassador’s wife entails much more than just hosting dinners for local dignitaries.
Helena Frith Powell meets a group of emissaries’ wives in Abu Dhabi who are crucial to their countries’ missions. Photographs by Nicole Hill. When you marry a man you don’t often expect to marry his job. But if you marry an ambassador, you must be prepared for anything. Most often, that means having your home invaded by visiting dignitaries and armies of staff. Your life is no longer your own. This was brought home to me when I was at university and my best friend’s father was ambassador to Paris. I was staying with them and one evening we were relaxing in the family sitting room, when the door burst open and in strode Margaret Thatcher, then prime minister of Great Britain. “Do you mind if I join you” she asked. “I find this sitting room so much cosier than the formal one.” The ambassador’s wife reluctantly put down her embroidery, stopped talking to her daughter and smiled. “Of course, Prime Minister, come in and make yourself at home.” Mrs Thatcher kicked off her shoes and sank into the sofa beside her. That was the end of our cosy chat. We moved on to the reason for Thatcher’s visit to France: the bicentennial of the French revolution. We discussed what dedication she should inscribe on her gift to President Mitterrand, a first edition of Charles Dickens’s novel A Tale Of Two Cities. The ambassador’s wife had to wait until Margaret Thatcher went to bed to hear her daughter’s news. This was par for the course. And yet I was rather attracted to diplomatic life. One evening I shared my ambitions with my friend’s father. “It’s not for women,” he told me. This was in 1989 and I hope things have changed by now. But looking back on it, I don’t think his advice was purely based on the fact that a girl’s career path in the British Foreign Office is not easy. This was his last posting of a long career. And throughout his years as a diplomat he had been accompanied by his most valuable asset: his wife. He might have felt that a woman was better able to serve her country by being an ambassador’s wife and learning how to adjust to an unfamiliar culture and to cater for several hundred guests, all the while maintaining an unimpeachable public image. This is the bare minimum. As you will see from the ambassadors’ wives M spoke to in Abu Dhabi, most of them contribute much more.
“We have been here since August 2007, but this is not my first posting as an ambassador’s wife. My husband Talmiz has been ambassador in Oman and Saudi Arabia. I was brought up mainly in England where I practised as a maritime lawyer. I still work as a consultant here in Abu Dhabi for Clyde & Co. I have twin daughters who are both trainee lawyers in London. My husband’s priority is to encourage investment into India, to develop trade, business and foreign relationships. I support him in all the promotional activities he does, but my role is also to promote India with the women here. So it is a two-pronged approach. I am not one of those women who play bridge and have endless lunches. I use my time to promote professional and cultural events such as a recent event showcasing dances and traditional costumes of India.